5 Things That Will Change Parenting As You Know It

If you actually wrote up a job description to describe all you do as a parent the number of responsibilities listed would make your head spin. You probably wouldn’t even be able to remember all the roles you play and events/people/things you manage everyday.
 
Most of what you do as a parent quickly becomes second nature—the first diaper you changed was by far the hardest and a few months later you could do it in your sleep with no lights on. And when a new need arises, you get it done without question because you want to give your kids the very best.
 
That’s a great goal, but let’s take a minute to reflect on the fact that you are a human being trying to play the role of a superhero. If you’re lucky, you have a trusted sidekick to lean on, but even sidekicks have their own agenda sometimes and they may even get in the way of your parenting routine when they show up!
 
So, is there a way to cut corners without sacrificing the greater good of your children?
 
Absolutely! Better yet, there are things you can do to make your parenting life easier while helping your kids learn valuable life lessons. Here are five of them that are easy enough to try today:
 
Give away a chore that you can’t stand doing.

• I know there’s no chore donation box you can toss your dirty laundry into, but I trust that you can find one thing—no matter how small—to pass along to your kids. When mine were toddlers they put away all the canned goods after grocery trips. I don’t know why I hated that chore so much, but my kids got it done and I didn’t have to.

• As your kids get older you can “share” more heavy-duty chores keeping in mind that children are capable of many household tasks. And I know your kids are busy, but you're not asking a lot. Trust me, they can handle it!

• You win because you don’t have to devote time to something that’s annoying and frustrating. Your kids win because they practice taking responsibility while experiencing what it’s like to contribute to the household in a meaningful way.

 
Create a space that’s all yours.

• Is there such a thing as privacy when you’re a parent? Personally, it sometimes seems that my kids feel very little is off limits. No one thinks twice before taking a sip from my water bottle, my snack is always up for grabs, and don’t even get me started on the places I find things that belong in my closet or bathroom.

• Carving out a space within your home that’s just for you provides a little bit of calm and serves as a reminder that you’re a person as well as a parent. Whether it’s an entire room, a corner of the shelf, a drawer, or even a notebook, find a space and put your stamp on it.
• You win because you have a small sanctuary to bring peace amidst the sometimes chaotic daily grind. Your kids win because they learn to respect boundaries. Bonus, by watching you set aside a space for yourself they will learn to do the same and practice self-care as they mature.

 
Drop one thing from your parenting routine.

• Even when you try to avoid being over-scheduled, life doesn’t stop and demands pile up quickly. Crossing off just one thing from your list can make a huge difference when it comes to your state of mind and energy level.

• Maybe it’s an after school activity or a volunteer position you hold. Maybe it’s skipping baths or showers one night (as long as no one’s covered in sweat or craft glue) or having a no-cook dinner (think sandwiches or cereal). It may not be the same thing every day or week, but giving yourself permission to drop something from time to time will help you reserve your energy and enjoy your kids.
• You win because you take one thing off your plate and your kids win because they see you being flexible and adaptable. This models those critical life skills so your kids are more apt to use them in the future if they’re feeling overwhelmed or spread too thin.

 
Give your child an alarm clock.

• Depending on your child’s age and sleep temperament, a well-placed alarm clock will serve one of two purposes. For younger kids or natural early-risers, set a rise-and-shine time when it’s okay for them to come get you. Before then, they can stay in their room and play quietly (some parents I know even leave a small snack on the night table if kids wake up super hungry and aren’t yet old enough to independently raid the pantry).

• For older kids or those who tend to sleep-in, setting an alarm will help get the day off to a good start and will prevent you from pouring energy into the seemingly endless wake-up routine—you know, the one that starts with you being sweet and peaceful and ends with you threatening to leave the house without your child if they’re not in the car in five minutes.

• You win because you gain a few minutes in the morning to sleep or do something more productive than begging your child to get up. Your kids win because they start taking responsibility for their own sleep schedule.

 
Say NO Sometimes.

• You say yes a lot. You even say yes without actually saying it by doing hundreds of things for your child that go unmentioned: Yes, I will get a present for the birthday party you’re going to. Yes, I will find a way to get your lacrosse uniform clean before the next game. Yes, I will honor your food preference of the week and supply snack bars that you like as of today.

• The point is, it’s okay to say no. And in saying no, you don’t have to have a huge conversation. You can hear your child out, let him or her know you understand they’ll be disappointed, and honestly refuse their request. If you’re out of practice, this may be hard but you’ll catch on quickly and this is potentially the biggest game-changer on the list.
• You win by setting healthy limits and boundaries. Your kids win because they learn to accept those limits and boundaries and they also get to practice coping with temporary disappointment.

JOIN Dr. Stephanie for Facebook LIVE
Monday 2/20 @ 9:00am
CLICK the link.
LIKE the page.
Get parenting tips that work in the real world!